Must you Plan?

With structure there is predictability, 

With predictability, there is certainty...

But structures break, 

Just the way they are made. 

And like water trapped in a dam,

Everything flows. 

It must! Reluctantly or gracefully.

Calmly, or forcefully. 

But it must mold as per the needs of circumstances. 

Plans, Plans, Plans. I have a plan for this.I have a plan for that. I have a plan for everything. But sometimes, my plans fail. And with age, I've learned that everything cannot be planned. And that there is a rhythm to life that needs to be heard. If plans are inconsistent with the rhythm - they often fail. Hear that rhythm! It has volumes to tell you. Hear it out and trust it.

In this materialistic world, we sometimes aim to achieve things that aren't meant for us. We strive to live a life not meant for us. We push, and we push a little harder until everything is in place and there is a flow... But the minute we stop pushing, things fall... apart. All the plans you've ever made crumble. All the dreams you've ever had are not at all desirable anymore. It's seems like a halt. A painful one.

In reality, it's a start to something new. It's a wake-up call. "Hey! I'm life. Listen to me... this is what you think you wanted and needed. Turns out, you ain't too happy. Just flow with me and I'll show you what you really want and need - your true happiness" and when that call comes... follow it. Be accepting towards it. Embrace it... for if you don't, it will drag you anyways. The more resistant you are, the harder it will be to feel the happiness hitting you on your face. The welcoming you are, the more overwhelmed you will be with happiness. Each day is to look forward to, rather than dread.

If you already have a life where you are living from the heart, I'm glad you know your life's rhythm. And if you are living a life you dread, I hope you hear the wake-up call - and make the changes you need. Listen to that rhythm - it's screaming to be heard.

Plans are great tools, but they are just tools. They help you to guide your life, not to dictate how things should go. Leave some loopholes in them, and let time fill them. Because when the time is right, things arrive and circumstances arise - some good, some bad - and they will change you and your life for better or worse. That depends on how you choose to view it. With synchrodestiny working, there are things bound to happen and sometimes we stop them by intensive planning - so then, they just barge in to our lives and destroy the plans. Eventually, we just work our way through them. And if we must do that anyways, why don't we just let them in and cherish the changes?

Divine compassion

I knew who you were when I looked at you, 

you were that divine 

that precious

that compassion

that love

that resides within

I wish you were all that to yourself.

More than others, to yourself.

Because everything with out, is within.

And everything within is with out.

Respect yourself and you respect the world.

Often compassion and generosity is promoted and rewarded in societies, but are we really all that compassionate or generous? How often do you let someone get away with something that you would never allow yourself to? Are you ever as generous and compassionate to yourself like you are to a stranger? Often there are limits to how benevolent one can be, but these limits are always tested. For strangers it's more lenient than family, for family its more lenient than self. But the limits are always there, be it for yourself or others.  

Now, I know there are people who play nasty. These are usually the ones most compassionate to themselves. Because they are able to be compassionate towards their behavior. But in our society, we call that being selfish. Is it really? I don't promote playing nasty, but I support the win-win situation. 

Ethics are something we can argue about all day and yet fail to reach a conclusion, but we do know that humans act on motives. There is always an intention behind an action. Intentions just like actions may not always be pure... and normally they carry weight with them. If your intentions are not pure towards others, can they be pure towards yourself? And if your intentions are pure towards others, are you sure you are part of the pure intentions? Are you sure that you don't leave yourself out when you think of others? And can you be sure that you think of others when you think of yourself?

Across cultures, the priority from oneself to another varies, and hence the discrepancies of compassion. Being Asian, I may think of others before me. But having lived in the West, I may even forget that others exist. And despite that, there is one person I am being compassionate to - whether that's me, or whether it's someone else. But that's not enough, because there is no balance. If  I keep everyone else before me, they will drain out my resources and I will be left with nothing to give. If I am just compassionate to myself and no one else, I will be alone and possibly lonely - for my resources may be abundant but I will have no one to share them with.

I have come to learn that moderation is the key. Give, give all that you have... but learn to give yourself some too. In a day, if I do something for myself, something that makes me come alive, I've noticed that I can give more than what I could before. But if I am not compassionate to myself, no one will be. I will be giving, giving and giving... with nothing to give anymore. But if I'm not compassionate to others, I will not have the satisfaction of giving. Instead, I will be so lenient to myself that there will be no discipline; and with an abundance of my resources... I would waste them if they weren't shared.

Each one of us has a story, one that requires compassion for all the hardships we've seen. No hardship is big or small, it is the impact they create that signifies the damage. At this point, what can help heal more than love and compassion? For without loving compassion, we are lost. Without it, we fear, we grow anxious and all we need is a helping hand. It doesn't matter where the compassion to heal you comes from, whether yourself or others. Just know, that you are always going to be there with yourself and it's easier to rely on yourself for compassion than others.

So the next time you engage in negative self-talk, or in-compassion for yourself. Be mindful, change that voice! Make it compassionate, be nice to yourself. If you aren't, no one will be. And if you make yourself happy in a day, you can definitely be contagious! :)

Just for today... Don't worry

Each one of us has responsibilities, some towards ourselves, and some towards others. With the stresses of our daily lives, it has become incredibly difficult to be calm and accepting. We constantly have something that occupies our minds. We worry, we fear, we become anxious... and how does that help? Worry doesn't sort things out. Fear doesn't eradicate situations. And anxiety doesn't calm a mind. When we dwell in the present moment, we have no fears, no worries and no anxiety. Because at this moment, nothing is wrong. In this moment, I am still living despite my past and my future. In this minute, if there is a problem there is a solution. In the future if there is a problem, in the future there is a solution - why worry now?

Often this worry, this anxiety, this fear is part of our daily lives because we forget to savor the present. But how to we savor this present moment? There are so many ways! Meditation, monitoring your thoughts throughout the day etc.  However, it is very common that when one meditates with an agitated mind, very little is achieved. It is because when we observe our thoughts, we get carried away... An agitated mind is further agitated when its attempts have failed.

But that doesn't mean that we should give up meditating, or other forms of activities that calm the mind - be it a massage, a reiki session, or anything else. It just mean that we need to simplify our minds before we relax them. An agitated mind is very very hard to relax.

So how do we simplify our minds, our thoughts and allow our minds to relax? The answer yet again is... Acceptance! Acceptance is a wonderful way to tell yourself "yes, I know I worry, I know I'm anxious, I know I'm fearful... but it's okay. With this acceptance towards the way I feel, I wish to let go because today, nothing is wrong. I accept what life brings to me this minute".

When a child is scared, terribly scared, the mother is the one to console him/her. With love, with compassion, with acceptance and without judgement, she is able to tell the child that nothing will happen. And that the child is safe and secure. When an infant cries after waking up, all it needs is to be in a secure embrace - to know that s/he is fine and nothing is going to harm it.

In times of stress, consciously, we are the children and we are the mothers. But in reality our mother is our higher-self/ subconscious mind/ All-That-Is ... whatever it is you believe in! Be it god, be it the inner being, be it the soul, or be it your subconscious mind. And as they say "qué será será"... what will be will be, part of you already knows the outcome subconsciously - so why fret. Be the child, learn to accept how you feel... let it go once you've accepted it, and then surrender to your higher-self, to All-That-Is.

Its all a matter of faith. I do not follow any religion, but I have faith. Faith that tells me whatever happens or will happen has a lesson for me to learn. I can worry about the problem, or I can let go and learn the lesson when it's time... either ways, my free-will will lead me to the lessons I must learn.

So just for today, don't worry. Leave that fear and anxiety behind and savor the now. Every minute you spend worrying is a minute taken away from your life.

When you can't fall anymore, you can only climb up...

Often we are faced with difficult situations, sometimes they are momentary and sometimes they are prolonged situations. The momentary ones are like one of those days where it rains inexplicably, and ruins plans for the day - but, it's still refreshing. Whereas the prolonged ones are like months and months of rain, with no sun, causing a huge turmoil within. 

Each turmoil is different, each has its own value of teaching. If we didn't have problems we would not have painful experiences that would allow us to appreciate the good and smooth moments of life. Sometimes, we fall into depressions for we feel overwhelmed by situations. And often, these depressions are catalysts for change. Some of us tend to resist change, never acknowledging that change can be for the good too. If good times don't last, bad times don't either... given that, we must acknowledge that whatever changes happen help us develop as a soul. The good times nourish our souls so that we are able to use that as strength to withstand and learn from the bad times. But in reality, there are no "good" or "bad" times, these are just experiences that shape you, and help you evolve as a soul. 


Sometimes a depression is caused by an event, or sometimes by a build-up of several events, either ways it is because we are unable to forgive somebody (may be ourselves or anybody else) or accept situations. And those situations have caused internal chaos of fear, anger and such "lower-vibration" emotions. But because we are dealing with such feelings and emotions, it permits us to go beyond. When you can't fall anymore, you can only climb up. 

Even today, depression is a stigma in society... but it actually is the time one can experience the most amount of growth. It is an opportunity and blessing in disguise. To be able to overcome depression, it is very important to look within and be self-nurturing. Self-nurturing takes forms of acceptance, love, compassion, service, forgiveness and most importantly relief, the minute we stop permitting issues to affect us we grow from them. It may sound easy, but never is. In fact, it may be easier to just continue staying in that state... but it's not worth it. The effort taken to accept and let go is what is required for the soul's growth. 

However, some people take days or months, while other take years but does that mean the growth opportunity is better when you cling to that state? No, not really. It's a matter of being ready. Many people would be aware of the Buddhist proverb "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear", it's some what similar in this case as well. When you feel ready to make the change, your teacher will appear as well - and this applies to any situation in life. And it's okay to not be ready sooner than later. It's okay to savor those moments as well, because until you are fully drowned in those feelings... coming out of them won't make a difference. We humans tend to learn from our feelings and emotions, it is the part of us that connects us to our higher-self. We are meant to experience all sorts of feelings and emotions so intensely that we become unaffected by it. And we can only achieve that state of peace when we remain unaffected by external issues and find refuge in internal joy.

So, whenever you are ready... take that first step. Address the issues that have caused inner turmoil. Talk to yourself, and tell yourself  "I know (these issues) are troubling me within, but I want to give this feeling some love, compassion and most importantly, I want to accept these feelings. And I thank them for giving me the opportunity to grow". Know that as you nurture yourself, you will hurt less. Develop a passion, and enjoy it with your heart when you engage in it. Once you are nurtured, deal with these issues - whatever they may be, and whatever they may need (whether acceptance or forgiveness) and don't associate them to emotions like fear. Always remember, your soul will never choose problems that you are not ready for.