I knew who you were when I looked at you,
you were that divine
that precious
that compassion
that love
that resides within
I wish you were all that to yourself.
More than others, to yourself.
Because everything with out, is within.
And everything within is with out.
Respect yourself and you respect the world.
Often compassion and generosity is promoted and rewarded in societies, but are we really all that compassionate or generous? How often do you let someone get away with something that you would never allow yourself to? Are you ever as generous and compassionate to yourself like you are to a stranger? Often there are limits to how benevolent one can be, but these limits are always tested. For strangers it's more lenient than family, for family its more lenient than self. But the limits are always there, be it for yourself or others.
Now, I know there are people who play nasty. These are usually the ones most compassionate to themselves. Because they are able to be compassionate towards their behavior. But in our society, we call that being selfish. Is it really? I don't promote playing nasty, but I support the win-win situation.
Ethics are something we can argue about all day and yet fail to reach a conclusion, but we do know that humans act on motives. There is always an intention behind an action. Intentions just like actions may not always be pure... and normally they carry weight with them. If your intentions are not pure towards others, can they be pure towards yourself? And if your intentions are pure towards others, are you sure you are part of the pure intentions? Are you sure that you don't leave yourself out when you think of others? And can you be sure that you think of others when you think of yourself?
Across cultures, the priority from oneself to another varies, and hence the discrepancies of compassion. Being Asian, I may think of others before me. But having lived in the West, I may even forget that others exist. And despite that, there is one person I am being compassionate to - whether that's me, or whether it's someone else. But that's not enough, because there is no balance. If I keep everyone else before me, they will drain out my resources and I will be left with nothing to give. If I am just compassionate to myself and no one else, I will be alone and possibly lonely - for my resources may be abundant but I will have no one to share them with.
I have come to learn that moderation is the key. Give, give all that you have... but learn to give yourself some too. In a day, if I do something for myself, something that makes me come alive, I've noticed that I can give more than what I could before. But if I am not compassionate to myself, no one will be. I will be giving, giving and giving... with nothing to give anymore. But if I'm not compassionate to others, I will not have the satisfaction of giving. Instead, I will be so lenient to myself that there will be no discipline; and with an abundance of my resources... I would waste them if they weren't shared.
Each one of us has a story, one that requires compassion for all the hardships we've seen. No hardship is big or small, it is the impact they create that signifies the damage. At this point, what can help heal more than love and compassion? For without loving compassion, we are lost. Without it, we fear, we grow anxious and all we need is a helping hand. It doesn't matter where the compassion to heal you comes from, whether yourself or others. Just know, that you are always going to be there with yourself and it's easier to rely on yourself for compassion than others.
So the next time you engage in negative self-talk, or in-compassion for yourself. Be mindful, change that voice! Make it compassionate, be nice to yourself. If you aren't, no one will be. And if you make yourself happy in a day, you can definitely be contagious! :)
Across cultures, the priority from oneself to another varies, and hence the discrepancies of compassion. Being Asian, I may think of others before me. But having lived in the West, I may even forget that others exist. And despite that, there is one person I am being compassionate to - whether that's me, or whether it's someone else. But that's not enough, because there is no balance. If I keep everyone else before me, they will drain out my resources and I will be left with nothing to give. If I am just compassionate to myself and no one else, I will be alone and possibly lonely - for my resources may be abundant but I will have no one to share them with.
I have come to learn that moderation is the key. Give, give all that you have... but learn to give yourself some too. In a day, if I do something for myself, something that makes me come alive, I've noticed that I can give more than what I could before. But if I am not compassionate to myself, no one will be. I will be giving, giving and giving... with nothing to give anymore. But if I'm not compassionate to others, I will not have the satisfaction of giving. Instead, I will be so lenient to myself that there will be no discipline; and with an abundance of my resources... I would waste them if they weren't shared.
Each one of us has a story, one that requires compassion for all the hardships we've seen. No hardship is big or small, it is the impact they create that signifies the damage. At this point, what can help heal more than love and compassion? For without loving compassion, we are lost. Without it, we fear, we grow anxious and all we need is a helping hand. It doesn't matter where the compassion to heal you comes from, whether yourself or others. Just know, that you are always going to be there with yourself and it's easier to rely on yourself for compassion than others.
So the next time you engage in negative self-talk, or in-compassion for yourself. Be mindful, change that voice! Make it compassionate, be nice to yourself. If you aren't, no one will be. And if you make yourself happy in a day, you can definitely be contagious! :)
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