Friday, May 24, 2013

You can't like everyone, and not everyone can like you.

Time and again we meet people of all types; people we love, we like, we dislike or we hate. It's always surprising how that one person can make you smile as if your whole life has been perfect and its annoying how another person can drive you so mad that it ruins your whole day. We always hear things like: "don't let it get to you and you shall be fine" or "what irritates you of another person are indicators of what you don't like about yourself" or "you can't like everyone and not everyone can like you", but do these advice really help?

Sometimes yes, and sometimes no, it really depends on how you use these advice. Do you just keep yourself away from these people? Or do you ignore them? And what about people who get on our nerves by just being around? How do you deal with them? It's not like you would wish for anything negative for them, but you would pray to never see them again. Often these people are the ones that teach us the most.... it doesn't mean that we should like them over the top to appreciate the lessons they have brought to us, but we should aim at all times to be unaffected by their presence. And when we are unaffected, we've learnt our lessons already.

You may say, what will that person teach me when they are so messed up already? Sometimes it's as simple as not to repeat the mistakes they make. Sometimes it's awareness of certain traits that are hurtful, or disturbing. Sometimes the lessons are really theirs, but we re-act a certain way for them to take action and learn from it. There is always an underlying reason as to why we enjoy, tolerate or are intolerant towards certain people and their behaviors. And living with them can bring about a lot of negativity and frustrations within ourselves, hence we use acceptance to restore our positive nature.

However, it's easier said than done! But there are so many ways to approach this situation. If you can't make peace with who they are as a person, try making peace with their behavior that irritates you... if not that, then make peace with not being able to like them. Accepting one of these three things shall ease or erase the discomfort within caused by another person. Once you make peace and accept that their behavior and actions are ones you have no control over, things slowly but steadily start falling into place.

We humans, learn through our emotions and as we exhaust the emotional reactions we have to people we dislike and hate... we become neutral and neutrality is vital to internal peace. So take this day and write of people you dislike and write things about them that trigger these feelings. And once you have something solid, try using acceptance in one of the three ways discussed above... and see if it makes a change. Slowly but surely it will! 

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